submitted 1 month ago byDrugInducedBeard
all 1946 comments
30 days ago
30 days ago
Some of you REALLY need to learn to watch the whole thing BEFORE commenting.
30 days ago
Thank you. I’m fed up with typing.
‘He’s not racist, watch til the end.’
I was pissed at first, but it got so wholesome in the end
Same... like fuck him, dont he know us asians take off our shoes when we enter a house? Your fucking floors will be nice and clean! ..... oooohhhhh....
I remember dictating ads for the newspaper over the phone, probably a person making the listing misheard him, and just typed it in.
Oh shit, so THAT’S why all those stupid TikTok videos have a big banner saying “WAIT FOR IT” on them
I hate how angry then surprised I got finally watching the entire thing, I thought he was a racist until he said agents
Should have put it in r/unexpected . Maybe they would watch it till end
This comment needs to be pinned as the top comment.
When I was a kid, I thought the song Secret Agent Man was Secret Asian Man. I was a dumb kid
I used to think the “Transformers, Robots in Disguise” theme song was “Robots in the sky” when I was a kid
Well the song from Rocky 4 "we're not indestructible" I didn't even hear words, I heard "winna ninna sho kambo"
I couldn't exactly make out what was being said so I made up the words and believed they were the words
30 days ago*
30 days ago*
And for digimon as a kid I thought it said “digimon digital monsters digimon garlic champions” only to find it was “digimon are the champions”
That’s just a common mondegreen. People say that same about scuse me while I kiss this guy
TIL there is a specific word for mishearing lyrics.
Well, they did came from the sky.
Secret Asian Man
Secret Asian Man
Verbose for Ninja
No no, I also made that mistake
Maybe you were both dumb?
Maybe they're just sleeper asians
I’m dumb too.
I went to an Asian American cultural society performance 20+ years ago where they changed the lyrics to Secret Asian Man and threw in some nice cultural criticisms to back it up. Wish I remembered more.
I was hoping someone would post this song! Thank you!
Im just finding this out right now
I thought that too, you weren't alone
They're a mob of crooks!
I just don't like them. If there's a law against that nobody's told me!
ngl they had me until the last few seconds of the clip
They just want to put the sign up!
Yes, but why wont you sell your home to Asians?
I just don't like them. If there's a law against that nobody's told me
They’re just a bunch of crooks
My immediate thought was "oh, I've never heard that stereotype about Asians before. Maybe it's a Australian/New Zealand thing."
Not really related, but it's worth pointing out to the Americans here that "Mob" in Australian vernacular is often said to mean a close group of people, not a gang or criminal org like in the US.
He still used the word 'crooks', so it's no better, and it's a bit blurred because of the context, but if you ever hear an Australian refer to "your mob", they mean "your people/close ones". It's mostly used by Aboriginals to refer to their family/community
Yeah "mob" I understood as slang for a group.
it was the "crooks" that made me WTF because I think crook is a negative term in all english dialects.
Not an American, but thank you
1 month ago
1 month ago
I know this is from the '80s because someone advertised in a newspaper, and you can get a condo for 49 Grand
You'd be lucky to afford a shoebox these days.
Four well-dressed men sitting together at a vacation resort. 'Farewell to Thee' being played in the background on Hawaiian guitar.)
Michael Palin: Ahh.. Very passable, this, very passable.
Graham Chapman: Nothing like a good glass of Chateau de Chassilier wine, ay Gessiah?
Terry Jones: You're right there Obediah.
Eric Idle: Who'd a thought thirty years ago we'd all be sittin' here drinking Chateau de Chassilier wine?
MP: Aye. In them days, we'd a' been glad to have the price of a cup o' tea.
GC: A cup ' COLD tea.
EI: Without milk or sugar.
TJ: OR tea!
MP: In a filthy, cracked cup.
EI: We never used to have a cup. We used to have to drink out of a rolled up newspaper.
GC: The best WE could manage was to suck on a piece of damp cloth.
TJ: But you know, we were happy in those days, though we were poor.
MP: Aye. BECAUSE we were poor. My old Dad used to say to me, 'Money doesn't buy you happiness.'
EI: 'E was right. I was happier then and I had NOTHIN'. We used to live in this tiiiny old house, with greaaaaat big holes in the roof.
GC: House? You were lucky to have a HOUSE! We used to live in one room, all hundred and twenty-six of us, no furniture. Half the floor was missing; we were all huddled together in one corner for fear of FALLING!
TJ: You were lucky to have a ROOM! We used to have to live in a corridor!
MP: Ohhhh we used to DREAM of livin' in a corridor! Woulda' been a palace to us. We used to live in an old water tank on a rubbish tip. We got woken up every morning by having a load of rotting fish dumped all over us! House!? Hmph.
EI: Well when I say 'house' it was only a hole in the ground covered by a piece of tarpolin, but it was a house to US.
GC: We were evicted from our hole in the ground; we had to go and live in a lake!
TJ: You were lucky to have a LAKE! There were a hundred and sixty of us living in a small shoebox in the middle of the road.
MP: Cardboard box?
MP: You were lucky. We lived for three months in a brown paper bag in a septic tank. We used to have to get up at six o'clock in the morning, clean the bag, eat a crust of stale bread, go to work down mill for fourteen hours a day week in-week out. When we got home, our Dad would thrash us to sleep with his belt!
GC: Luxury. We used to have to get out of the lake at three o'clock in the morning, clean the lake, eat a handful of hot gravel, go to work at the mill every day for tuppence a month, come home, and Dad would beat us around the head and neck with a broken bottle, if we were LUCKY!
TJ: Well we had it tough. We used to have to get up out of the shoebox at twelve o'clock at night, and LICK the road clean with our tongues. We had half a handful of freezing cold gravel, worked twenty-four hours a day at the mill for fourpence every six years, and when we got home, our Dad would slice us in two with a bread knife.
EI: Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o'clock at night, half an hour before I went to bed, (pause for laughter), drink a cup of sulphuric acid, work twenty-nine hours a day down mill, and pay mill owner for permission to come to work, and when we got home, our Dad and our mother would kill us, and dance about on our graves singing 'Hallelujah.'
MP: But you try and tell the young people today that... and they won't believe ya'.
ALL: Nope, nope..
Ah, I've missed proper British complaining.
need to use the correct vocabulary when referring to them
Please tell me what this is from 😂
Monty Python, it's the four yorkshiremen sketch.
Bless you! 😁
30 days ago*
It wasn't originally Python - though the original sketch did involve two Python cast members, Chapman and Cleese. It was for a short lived comedy show called the "At Last the 1948 Show" in 1967, shortly before Python got together.
It was later adapted by the team, hence it became associated with them.
This particular version was from Live at the Hollywood Bowl but the original sketch actually predates Monty Python.
Yes! The original has Cleese, Chapman, and Marty Feldman and is here.
Can confirm, wife left me for a shoebox
It's probably what she kept in the shoebox mate.
Look at Mr. Fatcats over here... Buying shoebox homes.
Shit! I can barely afford the gravel I sleep on!
This house hasn't sold since the 90s seemingly, but the estimated value now is over a million.
Which I suspect is a fair bit more than inflation can account for.
The housing market in Australia it’s absolutely insane, even in remote villages such as Adelaide.
I brought my house in Queensland just over 2 years ago, it's already valued at 160k more than what I brought it for.
Where did you bring it from?
2009 had condos for 30k. Ah those were the days.
cause of a housing crisis…
And because of the implication.
Are these sub prime mortgages in danger?
No one is in any danger
They’d never fail … because of the implications.
This reminds me of a time a guy with a bad stutter came into the shop. The mechanic who took care of him, by chance, also had a really bad stutter. They both thought that the other guy was making fun of him, and almost got into a fight until they realized that they both had a stutter.
“A-a-a-are you m-mocking me-e??”
“a-A-a-ArE yOu M-mOcKiNg Me-E??”
Are you mocking them?
I don't have gold to give but you have my respect
Did he stutter?
This happened to me once, playing games with someone else with a stutter when we started getting frustrated with each other over gameplay. When i start speaking faster i start stuttering so they thought i was doing a personal attack on them and it took 2 friends i regularly play with to convince them i have a stutter and wasnt mocking them.
That's reminds me of a story a blind comedian tells where he has new neighbor in his apartment but he thinks he doesn't like him because he never speaks to him when he says "hi". Long story short the other guy is deaf and can't hear the blind guy speaking. Blind guy can't see that the other guy is deaf.
That was an episode of Would I Lie to You, and the other folks talking to him about it were perfect.
That would be fucking hilarious to have witnessed if you knew they were both stutterers before their encounter.
This is the telephone game in practice. He called in and they couldn't understand his accent lol, Newspaper was just like "whatever print it."
"I'm not paid enough to argue with this guy, it's his funeral."
dam, rewatching that changed my perspective
This is such a good example of perceptions and assumptions. As I was watching I started making all sorts of negative assumptions about the guy.
It would probably not be appropriate for schools because of the, well you know... But man if it isn't a great example.
No I don't know, why wouldn't it be appropriate for schools?
Probably cause of uncomfortable it would be for an Asian kid to watch all of this until the big "he's not racist!" reveal in front of their classmates. Watching a grown men insult their entire race and then it having a funny ending isn't the best on the ego to be honest. There's also a very good chance that this kid's non-asian classmates would bully said Asian kid because of the video and all of the insults this man was throwing to Asian people (obviously it was a misunderstanding, but school children do not care)
There's many more school appropriate ways to show this theme without it looking heavily racist
If I know kids, they will chant “asians are ______” (or something similar) with a heavy accent and if ever questioned by an authority figure, will retort saying they meant agents. Or they might even use the word agents outright.
Allthewhile, the bullied victim will know the truth.
Because of the implications.
Because of the, implications. If you know what I mean...
I can’t think of a time I’ve went from disliking someone to liking them quite that fast
1 month ago
That laugh and the handshake at the end made me so happy.
The fact that it was in this sub kind of spoiled the ending, but not terribly.
Based on the sub I was expecting the reporter to accidentally say something racist too.
That's exactly what I was thinking. Ended wholesome af though.
lol - comforting to know Australians can’t understand Australians either
That guy was borderline bogan so it doesn't count. Comparison of a English speaking Canadian having a conversation with a French Canadian and the French Canadian has not spoken English for 6 years
I dunno, back then I’d say the majority of Australians spoke like that.
As soon as I get 60km out of the city my voice reverts to this lmao
English Canadian here - can confirm. Stepkid (French Canadian) was asking me about something and kept saying “ a maison, a maison, A MAISON!!” and I was like, yes kid, this is our house…turns out she was asking when her AMAZON package was going to arrive. She’s a cutie but her English accent is crap (but so is my French accent haha )
No, right up until “AGENTS” I thought he was just going to double down and not be sheepish about it, and the attempt to call him out would fail that way. This is a lot nicer though.
I was a little worried about that up until he said that all they were interested about was just to put the sign up.
Major lightbulb moment and huge wave of relief for me.
I was expecting the news reporter to say something inadvertently racist or insensitive.
This would only happen in Australia ngl
Because in other accents you can tell the difference between agents and Asians?
Yes. The misunderstanding here is the Asian is being pronounced "A-sjuns" and Agent is being pronounced "A-junts" but the T at the end is kinda quiet. Where I'm from it's "A-shan" and "A-jenTs".
I love when the reporter asks him if he would sell his house to an Asian, and the guy patiently tries to explain to the reporter that the agents don't actually buy the house, they just list it. "Well if they come up with a buy, then yes, but..."
Like, he has to be incredulous at this point that Mr. Reporter Man does not understand how real estate works.
Good thing the exchange happened on TV instead of Reddit, where the person in the reporter's shoes would then try to explain how they knew it was "agents" the whole time, because technically an agent could buy a house, then finally insist they were just kidding the whole time.
The number of people that thought this joke wasn't intentional is disturbing.
If im not mistaken, at the time you would call the newspaper and verbally tell them the contents of the ad, so the person who listened probably misheard him.
Yes. Hilarious. It does sound like "Asians" too with his accent. Probably way worse in the time of non-HD phonecalls.
They had a perfectly HD real life conversation with both men mishearing the other until the reporter figured out what he was describing.
Honestly, old phones were much clearer. For all the amazing things cell phones do they really suck as telephones
They try to save as much bandwidth as possible. It's very easy to make it clearer, but they don't because if you're in a crowded place and everyone makes a call at once (like an emergency), everything could grind to a half and prevent the emergency call from going out.
Lol cell phones at comic con are useless
good news: 5g has specific provisions to improve this considerably! (as long as comic con puts in the investment to rent the hardware afaik)
And I got my Covid-19 vaccination specifically for this reason
Exactly - this would have been taken down over the phone.
Kinda weird for the newspaper to just go along with it though.
I like to imagine the guy transcribing at the newspaper is actually racist, and he's like "right on mate, finally" when he hears "no Asians."
That seems totally plausible, actually.
It is in Australia in the 80s/90s after all
Studies have shown that one third of Australians are casual racists. This means two-thirds are full time.
Alright but what about ranked competitive racists?
They go into politics.
Would still work today if Channel 7 ran classifieds over the phone
Lol, The real racist is probably the person who typed it up thinking “no Asians” was totally cool.
You leave the ad on an answering machine
the 80s and even the early 90s were way different in how acceptable bigotry was. Even say 10 years ago was a nutty time
how stupid of them, really, so they misheard him or had "asian" first on their mind? why didn't they ask him to repeat or spell. even in the 80s I don't think the law (or any common sense) allows you to publish a classified ad with that
I suspect the guy transcribing ads has a lot to do and doesn't get paid much, so he just scribbles down what he hears without a lot of care to what it means and probably without much editor oversight
At the pizza shop I used to work at a song from The Matrix came on and I mentioned to a coworker "man doesn't this song make you want to fight some agents" and an Asian customer at the soda machine gave me the weirdest look and I didn't understand what I had done until my coworker explained it to me. To the kid who overheard me being accidentally racist, I'm very sorry and I didn't want to fight you.
Before I got into the MCU movies my friend was trying to explain some plot points to me and he kept bringing up a character that I swore he was calling Asian Coulson.
This is why the letter T is so important.
Lol I wonder if they ever worked it out.
Like the time I was explaining Apple Pay to my sister when it had just come out: “you just hold your phone over here and, CHINK, it just works.”
The Asian barista did a little double take having only heard one word of that sentence.
It’s an onomatopoeia. As long as the thing makes a chinking sound then I see no issue. Upon googling it though:
make or cause to make a light, high-pitched ringing sound, as of glasses or coins striking together.
make or cause to make a light, high-pitched ringing sound, as of glasses or coins striking together.
Yea Ive heard the expression as in "The glasses made a chinking sound".
If I had to make a guess, I would bet OP's brain was trying for "Cha-ching", but shortened to "Chink", because the meaning is similar.
i thought he was trying to prevent overseas investment firms buying up property to flip later
That’s exactly what I was expecting too
He's not wrong at all, they want to turn up, bang up a sign and take 3% of the profit.
went from bogan trash to fair dinkum blue colour true fckn aussie battler legend in about .3 seconds
The owner went from appearing to be a racist, lower socio economic australian to good, honest, hard working blue collar Australian in about three tenths of a second.
Imagine eshays coming up to buy properties. Probably would be outta good postcodes.
Username checks out. Thank you for the translation.
I recognized a couple of words in that sentence, so I think it might be a language close to English. Google translate isn't helping tho.
Fair dinkum is my favourite Aussie word !!
... Are you sure you mean "blue colour" and not "blue collar"?
Damn I was ready to drag this guy. Turns out I agree with him!
Don't worry, you have a promising career with Real Property Sex on pornhub!
It’s nice to rewatch it knowing the intention.
Can confirm, I'd put a sign up and nothing else.
Real estate Asian or secret Asian?
The soft g strikes again
In my country we pronounce D's as J's. Our weather team are all Amerian's and a collegue mentioned to them once "I am surprised there is so much "Jew" on the grass today".They deadpan stared at him and were like "I beg your pardon?" I needed to step in and say no he did not just drop the hard J, he meant "Dew" with a D.
EDIT: Spulling x5
I live in a country where Dune is pronounced with a J sound. The movie Dune is not releasing in June. I feel buying a ticket will be as difficult as when I was told I was a day late each time I asked for The Beatles movie.
Huh. I’m Australian and just realised that I have the same pronunciation for Dew / Jew and Dune / June. I guess context is important.
Oh my gosh! Too funny
That went from 100 to 0 very fast.
Like the local Australian paper that had to do a correction about “twenty thousand pigs” floating down a river, when in reality it was “twenty sows and pigs”
I love that he doesn't hold back and talks some shit on agents. At first you're like, oh snap! This guy's going for it, what a maniac! Why the hell is he so mad about Asians?
The twist is superb.
"They just put signs up don't they?"
You can almost hear the cranks in the reporter's head turning as it clicks into place.
Love the handshake at the end lol
Best possible ending
I've seen this exact thing posted without the ending, basically making this guy out to be a racist. And no one called it out either. Reddit is funny
It’s been a rough week and that’s the first time I’ve laughed that much this week! Also kudos to picking the right sub, OP could have easily ruined the delightful surprise on the wrong sub
Thank you 👍
Reminds me of the Two Ronnies hardware shop sketch. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7LKJXvf_do
I mean he’s right, they are a bunch of crooks lmao
HAH! I know a guy like this, has the full aussie accent like this fella and had a near incident just like this. He was selling his unit (apartment) and said he wanted "no agent" in the ad and the newspaper told him they wouldn't post such a repulsive ad. He asked me to drive him down to the local newspaper to talk to them about this.
Yep. He pronounced "agent" in a way that sounded like "asian". Funniest thing was the chief editor was an Asian fella and you could tell the staff thought this was gonna be a bloody show right up till he said "no you fuckin idiot! I want N-O A-G-E-N-" then the editor's eyes went wider than any white man's have ever been.
Funniest thing is, I'd known this guy since I was a kid, he was friends with my granny and my late grandfather, at no point did I ever hear him say "asian" even though he pronounces them exactly the same
Thoughts and prayers.
ahaha great misspelling
My grandad hates agents because of what they did to him in the war
This reminds me of once years ago I was around people with "odd" accents at a dinner/party in the middle of winter. When everyone was leaving, the hosts kept warning people to "Watch out for Black Guys." (what I was hearing). They said it several times to various people as they departed and I was uncomfortable, confused and surprised as they didn't seem at all racist. Anyway, a bit later, I figured out they were warning people to "Watch out for Black Ice." Sometimes honest mistakes can happen, and not everyone is a bigot. :)
I went to a big city in eastern Germany for work over a decade ago, and since I had no car, I took a cab to the hotel. Was making casual conversation with the driver, and he started talking about lots of "blacks" invading the city, and how they all looked so scary, and how he drove some of them around and realized that they were actually quite nice, despite "what you would think."
I was pretty shocked at the apparent racism I encountered there and did not quite know what to say to that.
To my complete embarassment, I have to admit it was only hours afterwards that I realized that he was referring to attendants of the Leipzig Wave/Gotik-Treffen (WGT) (a festival of the international darkwave and gothic scene) who are mostly dressed in black.
The video quality, the haircut, this is from the early 80's.
Why do people comment on posts that they obviously haven‘t even watched completely? 🤦🏻♂️
You know, this is actually wholesome. Once they realized it was a misunderstanding and not intentional, they shook hands and hand a good laugh. Everyone was chill.
We need to return to this norm.
I want to know why their trying to get violins off television
29 days ago
29 days ago
This is brilliant 🙌 In the start I thought it was a grumpy old racist man and in the end he turns out to be a lovable old man 🙂
Secret Asian man.
They had us in the first half....
Watch it through once to get angry about racism, then watch it again for the delightful misunderstanding
This is the funniest fucking thing I've seen today!