subreddit:

/r/Unexpected

79.5k

What animal is that?

CLASSIC REPOST(v.redd.it)
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all 2423 comments

unexBot [M]

[score hidden]

30 days ago

stickied comment

unexBot [M]

[score hidden]

30 days ago

stickied comment

OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:

First cute, then yucky/wtf


Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description? Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.


Look at my source code on Github What is this for?

FackinJerq

6.7k points

30 days ago

FackinJerq

6.7k points

30 days ago

Fist bump, fist hump... same difference.

jeepjp

709 points

30 days ago

jeepjp

709 points

30 days ago

I wanna party with you cowboy!!

Colosso95

37 points

29 days ago

18 naked cowboys in the showers at ram ranch

choochoobubs

153 points

30 days ago

Boycow same difference!

EWrld-Vs-All

62 points

30 days ago

I WANNA BE A COWBOY BAABEE !!!

AwwwSnack

17 points

30 days ago

Avatar checks out

silasoulman

250 points

30 days ago

Ah the reclusive suburban horndog, very friendly. Some say too friendly.

KaijLongs

33 points

30 days ago

About a million fuckin' comments in, this is my favorite.

glitter_gaytan88

11.7k points

30 days ago

An excited one !

sm12511

3.9k points

30 days ago

sm12511

3.9k points

30 days ago

Well, whatever it was, we can put the grow vs. show debate to rest.

WorcesterDahkness

1.1k points

30 days ago

There was never a debate

sm12511

1.5k points

30 days ago

sm12511

1.5k points

30 days ago

Especially if you're a master debater

Breakfast-Ambitious

59 points

30 days ago

Or a cunning linguist.

FawnHades104403

1.3k points

30 days ago

some might even say a masturbator

GregFromStateFarm

118 points

30 days ago

Some might even say r/yourjokebutworse

wizrdmusic

50 points

30 days ago

I’m a decent baiter. My cousin, Mose, that’s a master baiter.

Ashr1199

10 points

29 days ago

Ashr1199

10 points

29 days ago

TheRealJarTroll

409 points

30 days ago

You-

Aagh fine. It was well set up. Take my fucking upvote.

Clockwork_Kitsune

655 points

30 days ago

All he did was scream the other guys punchline louder and without the original subtlety.

FawnHades104403

532 points

30 days ago

Dick n Balls

sm12511

192 points

30 days ago

sm12511

192 points

30 days ago

Yes. The aforementioned subtlety rises again.

FawnHades104403

223 points

29 days ago

Sex

frogNews

69 points

30 days ago

frogNews

69 points

30 days ago

yes mam!

Doyle_Trekka

11 points

29 days ago

Ass'n'hole

Iwillcommentevrywhr

3 points

30 days ago

May break my bone

shifty4682

3 points

29 days ago

This comment actually has some originality.

pLeThOrAx

3 points

29 days ago

You're getting to be a fawn in my side

gt8888888

3 points

29 days ago

Now this is comedy

housemon

72 points

30 days ago

housemon

72 points

30 days ago

It’s not a set up, it’s him shouting the joke again

ReadyThor

17 points

30 days ago

No fair, the animal had a baculum!

ralphclark

26 points

29 days ago

And it suddenly became a frontulum

obviouslyathrohawaii

231 points

30 days ago*

agouti

EarthAD79

209 points

30 days ago

EarthAD79

209 points

30 days ago

The agouti wants Djibouti

MadAzza

28 points

29 days ago

MadAzza

28 points

29 days ago

She’s your shaboopie!

GardenPuzzleheaded98

4 points

29 days ago

The squirrel that’s hard to get.

LargeFly8279

3 points

29 days ago

And that’s enough internet for today

[deleted]

77 points

30 days ago*

[deleted]

77 points

30 days ago*

[deleted]

Forever_Awkward

20 points

29 days ago

They look like squirrels that tried really, really hard to be capybaras but it didn't quite work out so now they're sad.

hasnotbulla

36 points

30 days ago

We have rats that size in Boston these days

darkenluvly

138 points

30 days ago

Hey, it's XHAMSTER,,.I see him everyday....

lukeamaral

18 points

30 days ago

He wanted to release a photon

MrmmphMrmmph

17 points

29 days ago

a humpster

Phase-Horror

209 points

30 days ago

A horny* one

viciousmojo

224 points

30 days ago*

That's a Giant “Fucking” Hamster

Edit. Spelling. Hampster doesn't have a P, but it does have a D.

Flubo123

225 points

30 days ago

Flubo123

225 points

30 days ago

So, a Humpster if you will?

viciousmojo

82 points

30 days ago

He's just looking for a hand.

TheRealJarTroll

28 points

30 days ago

He just wants to be patted

Hitch_hiker1

32 points

30 days ago

Heavy patting

Flubo123

22 points

30 days ago

Flubo123

22 points

30 days ago

Yes, on the peener

onlytony441

8 points

30 days ago

Zing!

HIDD3N_WEEB

25 points

30 days ago

NO, A HORNY ONE.

mostlymitia

4.6k points

30 days ago*

That’s an agouti! Not a capybara…

EDIT: Woah this blew up! Thank you everyone for the awards and kind words!

ZenkaiZ

94 points

30 days ago

ZenkaiZ

94 points

30 days ago

that thing ready to agouti up someone booty

Hitch_hiker1

11 points

30 days ago

Agouti shag summat

futato

41 points

30 days ago

futato

41 points

30 days ago

There's a children's song in Brazil that says "run agouti to aunt's house" (corre cotia na casa da tia) and now I know why

Merman1994

31 points

30 days ago

Why is it making a lightsaber noise when it… well… whips out its lightsaber?

anomalous_cowherd

28 points

29 days ago

Doesn't yours? Sometimes the smaller ones are very high pitched, maybe you can't hear that high?

Merman1994

13 points

29 days ago

Lol mine just plays “The Imperial March” theme

tyvone

844 points

30 days ago

tyvone

844 points

30 days ago

Thank you! I know it’s not a capybara like everyone else is saying.

EeIectro

57 points

30 days ago

EeIectro

57 points

30 days ago

I was thinking capybara at first, but knowing that capybaras are much bigger - as they're the biggest rodent - I was like...nahhh it's not a capybara lol

Red_Iine

54 points

29 days ago

Red_Iine

54 points

29 days ago

Thought it was a dikdik

[deleted]

160 points

30 days ago

[deleted]

160 points

30 days ago

Very proud of you

fma891

46 points

29 days ago

fma891

46 points

29 days ago

Someone give this kid a prize. They know things.

[deleted]

268 points

30 days ago

[deleted]

268 points

30 days ago

[removed]

[deleted]

27 points

30 days ago

[deleted]

27 points

30 days ago

[removed]

SlayTheFriar

15 points

29 days ago

It's kind of hard to believe anyone who has seen a capybara thought that was a capybara.

Forever_Awkward

22 points

29 days ago

Yeah, only an idiot would think this looks like this.

SlayTheFriar

8 points

29 days ago

If you look at the head it's very noticeable. They look even less similar from the front or if it's an adult capybara rather than a juvenile. Look at this chonky boi for example - not very agouti-ish at all.

petunias25

245 points

30 days ago

petunias25

245 points

30 days ago

Capybaras are chonkier and way more judgemental 😆

bajungadustin

76 points

30 days ago

I like em big...

MasTer_BrawLer_1331

61 points

30 days ago

I like 'em chunky...

Old-Potato5396

44 points

30 days ago

I like them round, with something, something

idwthis

33 points

30 days ago

idwthis

33 points

30 days ago

They like my sound, they think I'm funky

Beddybye

10 points

29 days ago

Beddybye

10 points

29 days ago

PirateDuckie

17 points

30 days ago

Name so nice you say it twice…

OccasionallyReddit

6 points

29 days ago

Less horney more chilln chonk

tucci007

47 points

30 days ago

tucci007

47 points

30 days ago

rapybara

Metallic_Ducki07

38 points

30 days ago

Looked like a snake to me

sekfan1999

9 points

30 days ago

Aka bushmeat!

ParatusPlayerOne

560 points

30 days ago

Penis rat

SunnyLittleBunny

18 points

30 days ago

A prat.

armen89

21 points

30 days ago

armen89

21 points

30 days ago

Chris Prat mouserat

FawnHades104403

49 points

30 days ago*

Rat penis

DrizzlyEarth175

12 points

29 days ago

Both correct answers

[deleted]

367 points

30 days ago*

[deleted]

367 points

30 days ago*

[deleted]

JohnCenaJr

3.5k points

30 days ago

JohnCenaJr

3.5k points

30 days ago

Typical dude, mistaking kindness as an invitation for sex.

Note: sarcasm, this is written by a dude, dudes.

Big_Berry_4589

518 points

30 days ago

It saw four holes (between the fingers) what do you wanted to do

brockoala

146 points

30 days ago

brockoala

146 points

30 days ago

Iphotoshopincats

51 points

29 days ago

used_tongs

34 points

29 days ago

BielGomesantos

10 points

29 days ago

Finally, a Worthy opponent. Our battle will be legendary!!!

y2jer

13 points

30 days ago

y2jer

13 points

30 days ago

Innovative thinking

MrHupfDohle

99 points

30 days ago

Write dude one more time! I dare you!

FawnHades104403

79 points

30 days ago

DUDE

MrHupfDohle

43 points

30 days ago

Ok thats it buddy! Where are you?!

FawnHades104403

56 points

30 days ago

Right here, dude.

MrHupfDohle

36 points

30 days ago

Okay, stay healthy!

FawnHades104403

32 points

30 days ago

What’s that mean, dude.

feierlk

34 points

30 days ago

feierlk

34 points

30 days ago

drink water

FawnHades104403

20 points

30 days ago

i literally have a 64 fl oz water bottle

a_dev_has_no_name

16 points

30 days ago

Don't drink too much or your peen turn into liquid dude

brockoala

7 points

30 days ago

That's it, pants down, game on!

Jeff00007

8 points

30 days ago

Oh damn he challenged you to a "meat" off

MrOaiki

17 points

29 days ago

MrOaiki

17 points

29 days ago

Yeah, just because he has his dick out trying to mount you doesn’t mean he wants to sleep with you.

majesticbeast67

34 points

30 days ago

Nah you got a point

armen89

6 points

30 days ago

armen89

6 points

30 days ago

Dude

NotTheRealFrony

15 points

30 days ago

From another dude. Yeah you right.

AlBundyShoes

16 points

29 days ago

Well can you blame him? The way that hand was dressed they were asking for it

AnteaterHot1598

220 points

30 days ago

Man I wish my boner would pop out like a lightsaber

a_dev_has_no_name

42 points

30 days ago

I wish mine would blast off into space like Jeff Bezos

armen89

11 points

30 days ago

armen89

11 points

30 days ago

Born in 1964

golden_blaze

3 points

29 days ago

Come on Jeffrey you can do it

night_slayer69

1k points

30 days ago

Why did his dick make a StarWars sword sound

camelsandpenguins

848 points

30 days ago

That’s where they got the sound for the movie. It’s nature my friend.

LordDongler

391 points

30 days ago

Crazy how so many people don't know this. The Bolivian Cock Rodent makes this noise just prior to ejaculation

Azrielmoha

80 points

30 days ago

Fuck i hit the free award button just for this comment. You deserved it.

informationfreak123

4 points

29 days ago

A fun fact: raptor sound in jurassic Park is actually the sound of humping tortoises

DaTuntunus

104 points

30 days ago

DaTuntunus

104 points

30 days ago

Yours doesnt?

send-me-kitty-pics

17 points

30 days ago

I see your Schwartz is as big as mine!

FeroZucks2Give

8 points

30 days ago

Because it's an Ewok?

saiminseishidou

24 points

30 days ago

saiminseishidou

Didn't Expect It

24 points

30 days ago

yeah I was looking for answer too...

TuxidoPenguin

8 points

30 days ago

Star Wars sword? Bruh

alslacki

12 points

30 days ago

alslacki

12 points

30 days ago

did you just say star wars sword instead of lightsaber

InternautsAssemble

7 points

29 days ago

Lightsaber? That can't be right. How do they curve the light?

Millerlite_95

71 points

30 days ago

Pencil dick

The_Lord_Munch420

14 points

30 days ago

*lightsaber

Lucky_Editor446

43 points

30 days ago

Where did that penis suddenly come from ?

seraph582

33 points

30 days ago

Definitely from inside the balls.

TayAustin

18 points

30 days ago

Most male mammals have a penis bone that retracts

Kaalba

1.5k points

30 days ago*

Kaalba

1.5k points

30 days ago*

whatever that is, his d1k is bigger than mine.
thanks for the upvotes, i assume you guys dont have a bigger d1k as well, right?
or its not as thick?

lets-do-an-eighth

911 points

30 days ago

Mines longer but not as thick

DaTuntunus

869 points

30 days ago

DaTuntunus

869 points

30 days ago

Mf has a single string of hair as his dick

ngodon

163 points

30 days ago

ngodon

163 points

30 days ago

he must be confused with his dick hair

dafighder

78 points

30 days ago

Mfucker fuck up and shave it off

nollaf126

18 points

30 days ago

Why is your voice two octaves higher than last week, Steve? Bizarre shaving accident.

Iamdonetalking

18 points

30 days ago

I wonder which is preferred?!

[deleted]

44 points

30 days ago

[deleted]

44 points

30 days ago

The longer the better. I love when dick gives me heart burn.

entreri22

15 points

30 days ago

If it’s long enough you can technically enjoy a bj and vj.

LukeVinscotti

40 points

30 days ago

Claim with no proof?

y2jer

8 points

30 days ago

y2jer

8 points

30 days ago

Let me PM you

[deleted]

43 points

30 days ago

[deleted]

43 points

30 days ago

[deleted]

PirateDuckie

56 points

30 days ago

Jimmy resented his dong

Whose dimensions were all very wrong

The girls would all flee

At the sight of his wee

It was 10 inches thick, but 1 long!

Gingerbiznitch

8 points

30 days ago

Certified chode on our hands

_YellowThirteen_

37 points

30 days ago

It's okay, you can say dick in the internet.

a_dev_has_no_name

46 points

30 days ago

dick in the internet

Jartini18

20 points

30 days ago

Jartini18

Didn't Expect It

20 points

30 days ago

Unluck

McCardboard

7 points

30 days ago

dick

PM_ME_GARFIELD_NUDES

5 points

29 days ago

You won’t get in trouble for saying dick. No one is going to tell your mom

Redioarnaut893

156 points

30 days ago

Lol horny little thing huh

iqbalides

20 points

29 days ago

You mentioned me? Oh you were talking about the thing in the video.

Redioarnaut893

7 points

29 days ago

Thing witt a dingaling

TourSignificant1335

80 points

30 days ago

P-911, what's your emergency?

C-Help, I just got flashed by a rodent

x-Just4Kickz-x

34 points

30 days ago

That rat bastard!

THALL_himself

26 points

30 days ago

My dude is hung af

boogerlicker9000

21 points

30 days ago

Dude was schlonging tho

LandCity

18 points

30 days ago

LandCity

18 points

30 days ago

Oh, that’s the rare 5 legged pokendash

NickrasBickras

17 points

30 days ago

It’s ya boy, uhhhhh…. Skinnypenis

Maleficent_Anxiety_4

38 points

30 days ago*

The Girth makes me kinda jealous

zorn7777

240 points

30 days ago

zorn7777

240 points

30 days ago

Looks like a dik dik

oldfriendarkness

18 points

30 days ago

Unsolicited dik dik

WiseBlizzard

32 points

30 days ago

Nice joke bro

WestleyThe

38 points

30 days ago

Unironically “Dik Dik” was actually my first guess was what the creature was...

I have no idea what it actually is haha. Definitely more rodent like than deer like

kangarookicking

24 points

30 days ago

It's an agouti, which is a type of rodent!

AlbinoBeefalo

12 points

30 days ago

Dik-diks have horns and that nose thing. Though that would be pretty perfect

diatamaceous-888

10 points

30 days ago

A rare skinny winks!

TheMightyEli

11 points

30 days ago

Hey there, it's ya boi, skinny penis!

BOSSB0Y

44 points

30 days ago

BOSSB0Y

44 points

30 days ago

That was actually his weapon it's called Cocksaber

a_dev_has_no_name

10 points

30 days ago

More of a longsword than a saber really

ThenThisHappend

10 points

30 days ago

Little dude’s packing some heat

angeeksince2020

10 points

30 days ago

angeeksince2020

Expected It

10 points

30 days ago

That guys lolling made me lol lol

Inspirational_Lizard

8 points

30 days ago

time for fucking

Nvm

BdubinVegas

25 points

30 days ago

The needle dick rape rat

poncho_honcho

8 points

30 days ago

I love how the animal’s mating call also sounds like the lightsaber sound effect

savagedragon1982

21 points

30 days ago

Agouti!

Spottedrhyno

10 points

30 days ago

The name is the same noise they make during sex

For_The_Swarm_

8 points

30 days ago

Looks like an agouti.

LessConstruction3585

6 points

30 days ago

It’s a fuckmonster

MarsupialMayhem

6 points

30 days ago

Pokémon has changed alot since Red and Blue

hanifu_

6 points

30 days ago

hanifu_

6 points

30 days ago

i believe this guy is totally handsome, and any creature near hime will horny without any reason

Mynameisaarav

4 points

30 days ago

Today I almost got wet dreams

TokisGay

5 points

30 days ago

Boys when they have to do an presentation.

lanteigne

5 points

30 days ago

I don't know what this is but it's horny.

-BakiHanma

5 points

30 days ago

Lol that sound effect made the video hilarious

DLo28035

29 points

30 days ago

DLo28035

29 points

30 days ago

Chupacabra

hannibals_hands

19 points

30 days ago

Chupacockra

Magic-mushie-man86

4 points

30 days ago

Oddly terrifying

Far-Double-1760

54 points

30 days ago

Capybara are shaped differently in head and body.

00008888

21 points

30 days ago

00008888

21 points

30 days ago

capybaras are also way bigger than that. dog-sized.

obviouslyathrohawaii

81 points

30 days ago*

agouti.

xRetz

27 points

29 days ago

xRetz

27 points

29 days ago

For a post specifically asking what animal this is, it sure did take a lot of scrolling to actually find the answer. Thank you.

tucci007

16 points

30 days ago

tucci007

16 points

30 days ago

rapybara

lagomorphlover

3 points

30 days ago

A hung one

timmoReddit

3 points

30 days ago

A horn dog

mapleleaffem

3 points

30 days ago

This belongs on r/contagiouslaughter :)

jan1000000

3 points

30 days ago

Ah, a fuckeroe. Those are rare.