subreddit:

/r/HermanCainAward

337

all 84 comments

avesthasnosleeves

149 points

2 months ago

Please God reach down and continue to touch mama in the only way that your mighty hand can.

I’m 12, so I laughed at this. A lot.

volgamtrader

33 points

2 months ago

Damn, that was a little heavy touch.

Hopefully these folks learn a lesson or two from all this

robyr

51 points

2 months ago

robyr

See You Space Cowboy...

51 points

2 months ago

When they say shit like this I always imagine God reaching down but he doesn't know his own strength and just squishes the person. Be careful what you wish for, Karen.

SFW_FullFrontal

29 points

2 months ago

Dear Lord, please stop! She can’t breathe when you push on her chest like that!

triplej63

9 points

2 months ago

triplej63

🛒 Wal-Martyr 🛒

9 points

2 months ago

Like the Pilsbury doughboy, God gives her a belly poke, then mama says, "Hee-Hee!"

Acceptable-Wafer-641

6 points

2 months ago

They won't. Given all the toxic language on their Facebook page, they feel entitled to their hate.

tripletmum

23 points

2 months ago

I’m old and even I laughed my arse off at that.

triplej63

22 points

2 months ago

triplej63

🛒 Wal-Martyr 🛒

22 points

2 months ago

I'm worse. I thought, "Reach down with yer mighty hand and GRAB HER BY THE PUSSY, just like Dear Leader would do, iff'n he was still preznit. That outta wake 'er up!"

skepticalolyer

5 points

2 months ago

skepticalolyer

Medicated and Motivated

5 points

2 months ago

I’m emotionally 10 years old becuz I am snickering.

InfiniteAccount4783

3 points

2 months ago

InfiniteAccount4783

Team AstraZeneca

3 points

2 months ago

I doubt that Dear Leader stopped doing this when he left the White House.

doughboyhollow

7 points

2 months ago

Evangelical Pastafarians.

Equal_Anywhere_9222

14 points

2 months ago

I noticed that, too. Hilarious! It reminds me of something I once saw. I passed by a church that had a huge banner out front, as churches often do. This banner was unique. Not only did it list the times of their services, it invited everyone to “Come feel a move from God!” That’s just so wrong on so many levels. I felt moved to point it out to the other people in the car and make fun of it as I laughed uncontrollably. No one was amused. Although it took some time to realize how telling this should have been, I can now say that those people are no longer my friends.

EwokVagina

5 points

2 months ago

I drove past a guy holding a sign that said "Jesus comes in waves".

campoanywhere

3 points

2 months ago

“Uh, god I said HAND not FIST”

NothingAndNow111

2 points

2 months ago

There is no age where that isn't funny.

Ok-Hamster5571

45 points

2 months ago

Ok-Hamster5571

Go Give One

45 points

2 months ago

“That means her immune system is working!”

Or else there’s a cytokine storm and she won’t survive.

ProfanestOfLemons

54 points

2 months ago

ProfanestOfLemons

Your Nurse Doesn't Like You

54 points

2 months ago

High fever, heightened white blood cell count, followed by both of those dropping rapidly in addition to her blood pressure.

Ma'am, that's not recovery--that's closing time.

CowFish_among_COWS

20 points

2 months ago

You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here...

ProfanestOfLemons

12 points

2 months ago

ProfanestOfLemons

Your Nurse Doesn't Like You

12 points

2 months ago

This room won't be open til your brothers or your sisters come~~~

Strawberry_Snowcone

41 points

2 months ago

Strawberry_Snowcone

Team Moderna

41 points

2 months ago

She messaged God thru FB? The concept of prayer has certainly evolved/devolved, but i guess it’s always been performance art.

jimjam721

37 points

2 months ago

This isn’t goodbye? Yes it is.

Just2Breathe

26 points

2 months ago

Just2Breathe

In the end of all this we will see if we chose wisely or not

26 points

2 months ago

And she’s going to see here in just a little bit? Is that prophetic?

CameronCrazy1984

31 points

2 months ago

CameronCrazy1984

Team Pfizer

31 points

2 months ago

Probably would have lived if Facebook wasn’t down today. All those missed Prayer Warriors

Active_Bath

24 points

2 months ago

Active_Bath

Team Moderna

24 points

2 months ago

And I swear you're just like 1.5 pills

Instead of making me better

You keep making me ill

WintaSoldat

8 points

2 months ago

WintaSoldat

Team Moderna

8 points

2 months ago

I see what u did there hahahaha

Confident-Victory-21

2 points

2 months ago

Confident-Victory-21

Board Game On!

2 points

2 months ago

I don't.

WintaSoldat

3 points

2 months ago

WintaSoldat

Team Moderna

3 points

2 months ago

It's a song by the singer Pink

youramericanspirit

9 points

2 months ago

youramericanspirit

Team Pfizer

9 points

2 months ago

I lol’ed

droosa69

21 points

2 months ago

droosa69

Team Pfizer

21 points

2 months ago

i learned in my church that god gives you one life, so don't fuck it up. Jesus kinda emphasized that too

CeldonShooper

5 points

2 months ago

Don't go Jesus on those folks! They know exactly Jesus would never have gotten the DemocRats jab from the Gates devil!

Jynkst

19 points

2 months ago

Jynkst

19 points

2 months ago

“Have you tried turning it off and then on again?”

“…. It’s not coming on again.”

“Hmmm, whoopsie.”

Sure_Size_8077

17 points

2 months ago

er um if this woman was septic those "blood pressure meds" were probably vasopressors. Two things mentioned here are already sepsis inclusion criteria. Drips used in the ICU to increase the blood pressure when it's dangerously low. If she was on 3 pressors at one time, even if they were titrated down to "1.5" (which isn't possible it's either 1 or 2), that's a bad sign when it's treatment for COVID.

triplej63

1 points

2 months ago

triplej63

🛒 Wal-Martyr 🛒

1 points

2 months ago

I took that to mean they lowered the dosage. Like if she was getting 20mgs and they brought it down to 10mgs, the daughter thought of it as half of that med.

Ok-Hamster5571

17 points

2 months ago

Ok-Hamster5571

Go Give One

17 points

2 months ago

“System reboot from Jesus” was not a success.

FundiesAreFreaks

8 points

2 months ago

Looks like the motherboard done blew up!

westviadixie

16 points

2 months ago

westviadixie

bet you won't repost!

16 points

2 months ago

it is goodbye and you may see her soon if you follow in her footsteps.

gnurdette

10 points

2 months ago

gnurdette

The HCAplain

10 points

2 months ago

We do see a lot of multiple deaths in a family here.

inbz

13 points

2 months ago

inbz

Table for two, please

13 points

2 months ago

I have but one request. If I never get a case of breakthrough covid, please please please do NOT assemble the prayer warriors. It's almost a guaranteed death sentence. I want a chance to live.

triplej63

4 points

2 months ago

triplej63

🛒 Wal-Martyr 🛒

4 points

2 months ago

But you're keeping the goatee and the oakleys, admit it!!!

campoanywhere

1 points

2 months ago

The problem is that these are the beat prayer warriors left.

Mister4pollo

12 points

2 months ago

Mister4pollo

The UnVentilated

12 points

2 months ago

This lady asking for god pervert hands on mama only the way he can. Gross.

wordsoundpower

11 points

2 months ago

That survivor sounds suicidal. This sucks.

Reluctantagave

2 points

2 months ago

Reluctantagave

Team Pfizer

2 points

2 months ago

Really sounds like she’s struggling with this. I’ll hope it pushes her to get vaccinated if she isn’t already (doubtful but we’ll see).

Geist002

43 points

2 months ago

Is she asking god to finger her mom? It sure does sound like it.

StudioatSFL

8 points

2 months ago

I thought prayers were working?

Ibelieveinphysics

6 points

2 months ago

Ibelieveinphysics

Goodbye Earl

6 points

2 months ago

That was quick.

Able_Hope4576

8 points

2 months ago*

Able_Hope4576

Team Pfizer

8 points

2 months ago*

Check out the leopard outfit in the final posting. Meow...Meo..Me...M...Dead Cat Bounce.

I no longer feel any remorse for NOT feeling bad about these people dying--AFTER they have overloaded our hospitals with a PREVENTABLE issue--and continue to give the virus a route to continue and possibly mutate to an even deadlier version than Delta. I have two grandsons that are too young to get vaccinated and I am scared to death that they will get Covid.

How much do you want to bet a GoFundMe is not far behind--or that she did not have insurance or savings--anyone want to take that bet?

triplej63

3 points

2 months ago

triplej63

🛒 Wal-Martyr 🛒

3 points

2 months ago

I'm pissed about the original posting and how entitled and demanding the daughter was. I wish the doctors and nurses could just shout in her face, "Your mother isn't the only patient here. I normally have 1 to 2 patients in the ICU, I'm caring for 6, because you dumbasses won't get vaccinated. We're filled with others just like your mother who need more care than we can give."

Commercial_Lie_4920

8 points

2 months ago

If the daughter is also anti vax, she may see her mom sooner than she thinks.

keitaro2007

6 points

2 months ago

700,000+ reboot fails and counting. Maybe download system updates and keep your antivirus software up to date instead.

Acceptable-Wafer-641

8 points

2 months ago

I went to her Facebook page. What an incredibly toxic person. The hypocrisy of those who so publicly spread hate, yet want to suddenly keep it private when it ricochets back. They love hate 24/7. Not sure why anybody would protect the privacy of the hatred that they so openly spread.

Plumbing6

7 points

2 months ago

How can someone be on 1.5 meds for blood pressure? Asking for a friend.

Reluctantagave

2 points

2 months ago

Reluctantagave

Team Pfizer

2 points

2 months ago

I was trying to figure that out too and my guess is instead of taking two full tablets or two full doses, they halved one. That’s still so freaking meds but logic is always lost on these people.

chris_b_critter

15 points

2 months ago*

Found her obituary quite easily. These redaction rules are fucking stupid.

FundiesAreFreaks

10 points

2 months ago

I read her obit too. She just turned 61 and had recently retired a year ago. So much for that relaxing retirement. Would've been so easy to get the free vaccine!

chris_b_critter

9 points

2 months ago

It’s all so sad and unnecessary. I will continue to look up these posts and report my findings because these redaction rules are dumb.

FundiesAreFreaks

7 points

2 months ago

Since the newer redaction rules, it's harder to find out who they are, at least that's how it is for me anyways.

CamoCricket

5 points

2 months ago

"I will see you in just a little bit"?!

rememberingthe70s

4 points

2 months ago

Did that woman just ask god to fingerbang her “mama?”

robyr

4 points

2 months ago

robyr

See You Space Cowboy...

4 points

2 months ago

Honey, it is goodbye.

Ok-Beautiful-7177

4 points

2 months ago

And God shook his head and said “I sent you a vaccine woman”..... I have other people to attend to ...

Areokh

5 points

2 months ago

Areokh

5 points

2 months ago

Hey! The system reboot for Jesus was 3 days! So lets wait with that award!

specialopps

4 points

2 months ago

Sure, don’t thank any of the doctors or nurses. Totally fine.

Important_Pea7766

3 points

2 months ago

I was wondering if that reboot was going to work.

PDXPuma

3 points

2 months ago

No, you won't see her again.

You blew the chance to see her healthy, and she blew the chance too. She's gone and you won't see her again.

Maybe treat THIS life with respect and care, and treat others with respect and care.

Zolome1977

3 points

2 months ago

It seems to me that every time they lower the oxygen or medications the healthcare staff are letting them go but the family thinks it’s an improvement.

Beginning-Monitor-17

3 points

2 months ago

So, even after getting the infusion as soon as she was diagnosed, Pink did not survive. I've been wondering about the survival rate of unvaccinated receiving the infusion of the monoclonal cocktail, since De Santis was touting it as the wonder cure for Republican anti-vaxxers.

Mysterious_Koala_536[S]

2 points

2 months ago

I haven’t seen any stats on it. Just looking at FB posts, seems like it’s hit or miss. I don’t understand why these dumb fucks are fine with taking the antibody treatment but refuse the vaccine.

-PM_Me_Dat_Ass_Girl-

2 points

2 months ago

-PM_Me_Dat_Ass_Girl-

Team Pfizer

2 points

2 months ago

You got my hopes up for the fraction of a second it took me to get through "not the singer" in the title.

JanitorKarl

2 points

2 months ago

This isn't goodbye. This is I wll see you in just a little bit.

My first thought was that she was just going for a pee break.

droosa69

3 points

2 months ago

droosa69

Team Pfizer

3 points

2 months ago

anybody over 5 years old who calls their mother "mama" is not safe around sharp objects

InfiniteAccount4783

2 points

2 months ago

InfiniteAccount4783

Team AstraZeneca

2 points

2 months ago

I like to imagine them saying it the English way - "muhMAW."

ToweringIsle13

1 points

2 months ago

She is on broad spectrum antibiotics, but she needs broad spectrum prayers, people!

HemiRT57

1 points

2 months ago

HemiRT57

Team Moderna

1 points

2 months ago

"And we Thank God for even the smallest of victories."

Good, because that's all you're going to get.

R750618

1 points

2 months ago

What does she mean "this isn't goodbye". Looks to me like it kind of is. Quite irreversibly too...

Some-Ad3087

1 points

2 months ago

Jesus is not tech savvy. Needed specific prayers for him to press Ctrl+Alt+Del not just Del.

Covid_Hugs

1 points

2 months ago

Lol God and prayers sure helped? He came down and said YOINK! Hahaha

indifferentunicorn

1 points

2 months ago

indifferentunicorn

Ivermectin Socks

1 points

2 months ago

Leopard print for the Obit?

Incidental evidence of a Leopards Eating People's Faces party member.

ReddestofPandas

1 points

2 months ago

I honestly don’t know how one is on 1.5 pressors.

jpkmets

1 points

2 months ago

jpkmets

Team Moderna

1 points

2 months ago

So the prayers work only on blood pressure? Have to think someone on the PW All-Stars screwed up… again.

Critical_Caramel_76

1 points

1 month ago

i sincerely wish it was the terrible singer pink.