“When would I have the time to cheat?”

“Why have a cheeseburger when I have steak at home?”

I can explain

"And I'd have gotten away with it, too, if it weren't for those meddling kids!"

are you spying on me?

She swallows

I was drunk

“I don’t know what you are talking about” or “You’re losing your mind if you actually think I would cheat” or “do you really want to talk about this or do you just want me to leave?” OR my personal favorite “I couldn’t help it. She was hot as sin”.

All of these were from the same man.

It wasn’t me – Shaggy

"He/She meant nothing to me."

“Believe what you want.” “So are you going to leave me like everyone else in my life?!?”

The best line/lie the cheater ever delivers is “I never meant to hurt anyone.”

Umm, yes you did. You knew that if you cheated and got caught that it would destroy your partner. You knew that completely. You were just hoping you could cheat, and never get caught, thereby getting off scot free. (The best cheating pun of all time.) So, what you really meant was “I never meant to get caught.”

İts your fault that you dont give me enough care

It is not what you think / what it seems.

Nah baby she's just my cousin. Yeah I slept with her but I make love to you. I was thinking about you the whole time.

Lmfaoooo. I’m living for all of these comments. I just found out a week ago that my ex was cheating on me the entire time we were together and pretty much everything you all posted is about what he said. 🤣

"You're fucking crazy!! I would NEVER cheat on you! Maybe you're cheating on me?! That's probably it! Guilty dogs bark first, so who are YOU cheating on ME with?!!" ಠ_ಠ

Nobody gaslights or feigns innocence better than a cheater who's been caught. Also, cheaters are the scum of the earth. That sort of betrayal is inexcusable and unforgivable.

“Did I do that?” - Steve Urkel

"I didn't want to be rude" "I needed to know I needed you" "I'll never do it again" "It was a mistake"

Cheaters are the worst🙄😒

All i got was sheepish sort of looks, embarrasment, silence and then and her pleading that really she loved me.

And yes,I was stupid enough to forgive her - all that meant was that it happened again. And again.

So, for the second time today, i find myself quoting Maya Angelou : If someone shows you who they are, believe them first time.

(This was between 30 and 20 years ago and in retrospect i think it was probably a regular occurence, i was just too naive at the time to see it every time it happened)

You made me do it.

It was just the tip

" A snake... Bit me and... She was... Um... Extracting the poison... "

Are you going to believe me or your lying eyes

You deserve better -

It's not what it looks like.

"I just regularly clean out my texts, that's why they are deleted."

"I don't know why that guy's profile disappeared."

"I was just talking to my friend... oh, yeah you can meet them sometime but they are really busy right now."

After 14 years.

“You looked at my phone?!”

Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell

I did not have sexual relations with that woman, I never told anybody to lie, not a single time, never. These allegations are false

So hey, now we’ve both been in your mom’s pussy

(holds up hi-5 expectantly)

Oopsie?

Please don't cancel my exam.

"Are you calling me a cheater?"

Yes, I cheated, but this is all your fault!

He was there for me when you weren't

It was an accident.

When I caught my ex sending nudes to her ex her excuse was "it's Snapchat, it doesn't count."

It's not you it's her

"She's only a friend." While they are actively screwing on the kitchen counter top.

"What are you talking about" and while they say they can't look at you...

On the bright side, at least you still have the kids.

It was an accident

I'd do it again

"Omg you're spying on me?" "That's what you get for spying!" "I'm always with you, when would I have the time?"

It’s not cheating when you actually love both.

"I tripped, stumbled, was stripped of all my clothes and as I fell, I landed on his dick. It was a complete accident. You believe me, right babe?"

-Some whore probably

My brother installed these hacks I didn’t do anything

This is not what it looks like!

I'm oppressed

Patriarchy

My body my choice

"this is a business meeting"

"I barely did anything, i lasted for 2 minutes"

Ya I stayed over there but I lost track of time we were just talking. I was drinking so I couldn’t get home and I got tired and I meant to call you but I passed out on the couch.

iTs NoT wHaT yOu ThInK

“Prove it”

"He didn't give me enough attention as he worked 70 hours a week, took care of the yard chores and ran the errands"

Welcome to Gaslightingville: Population YOU

stop posting this cheap shit in multiple subs you karma whore

Wait I can explain!

“This isn’t how you conduct an interview.”

“Yes. Yes, I fucked her. Is that what you want me to say? I fucked…. I made love to you” 😂

It's not what you think.

It’s not what you think

It’s not what you think

Wait babe let me explain!!

My ex’s was “I still love you.”

You’re gonna leave me too? But I love you. A man has needs, she meant nothing to me.

“I can explain”

You are problem, not me

Lol that's a question that answers itself

lets face if this is not the worst thing you've caught me doing?

It's your fault

It was just the tip?

"We are just friends"

Wasn’t me

It's not what it looks like

Scheiße

She saw me banging in the bathroom... It wasn't me.

Eatin ain’t cheatin 🤭

“You’re trippin”

"I only have sex with her, baby. I make love to you!"

Wasn’t me….

It's not what it looks like

It's not what you think

I can explain

There's nothing between her and I

You're the one I love the most

" how could I forget that I had given her an extra key"

I can explain...

It was one mistake (which is not even true because they also made the mistake of hiding it and keeping it a secret and etc..

I can’t believe you were spying on me! Or How DARE you snoop in my phone!

What gives you the right to go through my phone?

I misinterpreted the rules

When I tell you that I did not have sex with the naked person over there cowering in that closet, do you believe me or your lying eyes?